A Choice for Kindness

We have a neighbor we call Mkisii because he hails from the Abagusii community of western Kenya. I've known him for the past twelve years since he came to live on the land that borders our farm on the northern side. A man of modest means, he used to come to our home to borrow water before Mum instructed him to refrain from doing so.

Though Mkisii no longer comes to our home for water, he has been having an annoying habit of letting his goats stray into our farm. Mum has flown into a rage at the sight of his goats feasting on grass and food crops on our farm. And however stern she has been with him, he has left his goats to wander on our farm through gaps on the fence separating our land from his.

One morning in October 2019 after the goats strayed into our farm, I tethered them to a tree to keep them from devouring food crops on our farm. When Mkisii came for them a few hours later, I demanded KSh 200 for the work I had done of tying the goats to a tree. He promised to pay me once he received the salary he earns as a watchman.

Being the smart young man that I am, I kept reminding Mkisii about the money. But however hard I tried to get it from him, he would come up with an excuse as to why he was not in a position to pay me. Eventually, I stopped bothering him after realizing getting money from him was like getting blood out of a stone.

Last year, matters came to a head when one of our domestic workers spotted Mkisii's children stealing guavas from our farm. Mum was so vexed to hear about it that she asked me to be on the lookout for the children. I didn't see them on our farm but it also vexed me to hear they were pilfering fruits from our farm.

Besides letting his goats stray into our farm and allowing his children to eat our guavas, Mkisii has also offended us for using our road when going to and from Kiserian Town. Mum was the first to raise complaints when she spotted Mkisii using the road.

Later on, I noted a gap on the fence separating our land from Mkisii's. I suspected he and his family were using the gap to trespass on our farm without our knowledge. And when I confronted him about it, he denied using the gap to enter our farm.

A few weeks later, I noticed the gap had become wider after someone cut a barbed wire on the fence, thus raising my suspicion that Mkisii was using the gap to trespass on our farm. My suspicion turned out to be right because I caught him red-handed using the gap to enter our farm two or three months ago.

Though I can't recall all that I told him, I remember instructing him to seal the gap with kei-apple plants. But instead of doing so, he seems to have continued using the gap because I have noticed a beaten path on the ground below it.

Given how Mkisii has a history of lying to me, I have been tempted to speak rudely to him and call him an inveterate liar. I have even visualized rebuking him for all the times he has lied to me, like when he promised to pay me KSh 200 for the work I did of tethering his goats.

But on mature reflection, I have chosen to be kind to him. For one thing, he is a widowed man bringing up three or four children on his own. His wife passed away three years ago, and he came to our house to inform us about it.

I have asked myself: Why be rude to a widowed man of modest means struggling to raise children on his own? And that has reminded me of a quote that says, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

The Bible, my code of conduct, says in the book of Proverbs that "he who despises his neighbor sins". Perhaps it is that verse that has made me fear that God could refuse to grant me the desires of my heart if I spoke arrogantly to Mkisii. I will therefore be kind to him. After all, it's more important to be kind than to be right.

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RECOMMENDATION: If you've enjoyed the above story on being kind, you might also enjoy another one on "Death Strikes My Neighborhood" which I wrote about three years ago.