But it didn't occur to me that people also fear success till I read Susan Jeffers' Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway several years later. According to Susan Jeffers, people fear failure, they fear success; they fear dying, they fear living; they fear changing, they fear getting stuck.
Come to think of it, people do actually fear success. They can't stand being famous and talked about. All they want is a lot of money without having paid the price of success. Napoleon Hill should have included the fear of success in his list of the main fears that keep people from succeeding in life.
Let's face it: becoming a success requires a lot of hard work. And success brings with it new challenges and extra responsibilities. The lovely and talented Dolly Parton summed it best when she quipped, "The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain!"
For Bill Clinton, one of my heroes, success seemed to have come to him naturally. During his years as U.S. President, he always appeared comfortable in his own skin despite the challenges he faced. There was a time I used to drool over photos of him in "Time" and "Newsweek" magazines.
Given the way I have had a tendency to crucify myself for the foolish things I have done - a habit that often left me feeling guilty and insecure - I used to wonder whether I can handle the weight of success as gracefully as Bill Clinton did.
Can I stand getting featured in the media, being known by famous people, getting talked about by strangers and being invited by institutions to deliver speeches? And can I endure the hate and slander by the false friends and true enemies that come with success? I wondered.
Gladly, after much personal development, I am beginning to feel that I can handle the weight of success. That personal development program has made me know that success starts in the mind. Stephen R. Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, had it right when he wrote:
Private victories precede public victories. You can't invert that process any more than you can harvest a crop before you plant it.Yes, success (public victory) starts in the mind (private victory). I will therefore continue growing in skill and knowledge while striving to think clearly, creatively and positively.
And Michelle Obama has given me hope that I can attain success just by being me. In her captivating memoir, Becoming, Michelle mentioned that we don't have to look a certain way in order to be successful. Her point was that we can make it in life irrespective of our looks and backgrounds.
Michelle was right because history is replete with stories of people who overcame overwhelming odds and became successful. There are those who were bred in poverty, yet became genuinely wealthy. And there are those who had disabilities, yet became masters of their craft.
Just as an example, Bill Clinton grew up without his father. And the man his mother married turned into an abusive husband. Despite those challenges, Bill Clinton became one of the youngest and most charismatic presidents that America has ever had.
Such stories of people who have succeeded against all odds make me believe that I can also be a success. And if I ever become successful (and I am believing I will), I hope to remain humble and upright. I would hate to brag about my success, even to those who have looked down on me.
By the way, Stephen R. Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and Michelle Obama's Becoming have extraordinary depth and solidity. I recommend those two books to anyone who wants to change their life for the better and overcome the fear of success. Adieu!
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RECOMMENDATION: If you've enjoyed the above story on overcoming the fear of success, you might also enjoy another one on "The True Meaning of Success" which I wrote a couple of years ago. Just click on that link in blue to dive straight into the story.
